Re: The Rights of Your Wife in Islam
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Re: The Rights of Your Wife in Islam |
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Posted by Annette on January 29, 19102 at 02:35:03:
In Reply to: The Rights of Your Wife in Islam posted by Muslim on January 28, 19102 at 10:49:46:
:A Wife
:
:By getting married you are not just getting a wife, you are getting your whole
:world. From now until the rest of your days your wife will be your partner,
:your companion, and your best friend. She will share your moments, your days,
:and your years. She will share your joys and sorrows, your successes and
:failures, your dreams and your fears. When you are ill, she will take the
best
:care of you; when you need help, she will do all she can for you. When you
:have a secret, she will keep it. When you need advice, she will give you the
:best advice. She will always be with you: when you wake up in the morning the
:first thing your eyes will see will be hers.
:During the day, she will be with you, if for some time she is not with you by
:her physical body, she will be thinking of you, praying for you with all her
:heart, mind, and soul. When you go to sleep at night, the last thing your eyes
:will see will be her, and when you are asleep you will still see her in your
:dreams. In short, she will be your whole world and you will be her whole
world.
:The best description that I personally have ever read describing the closeness
:of the spouses to each other is the Qur'anic verse which says: "They are your
:garments and you are their garments." (Surah Al Baqarah 2:187). Indeed,
spouses
:are like garments to each other because they provide one another with the
:protection, the comfort, the cover, the support, and the adornment that
:garments provide to humans. Just imagine a journey in the winter of Alaska
:without garments! Our spouses provide us with the same level of comfort,
:protection, cover, and support in the journey of our lives on this earth as
:garments would do in the Alaskan journey.
:The relationship between the spouses is the most amazing of all human
:relations: the amount of love and affection, intimacy and closeness, mercy and
:compassion, peace and tranquillity that fills the hearts of the spouses is
:simply inexplicable. The only rational explanation for these most amazing of
:all human feelings is that: it is an act of Allah Subhanahu wa Ta'ala, "And
:Allah has made for you Mates (and Companions of your own nature ..." (Surah Al
:Nahl 16:72)
:Only our Almighty Allah Subhanahu wa Ta'ala in His Infinite Power, Boundless
:Mercy, and Great Wisdom can create and ingrain these amazing and blessed
:feelings in the hearts of the spouses. In fact Allah Subhanahu wa Ta'ala is
:reminding those who search for His signs in the universe that these feelings
in
:the hearts of the spouses are among the signs that should guide
:humans to His existence as He says in the Qur'an, "And among His signs is
this,
:that He created for you mates from among yourselves that you may dwell in
:tranquillity with them and He has put love and mercy between your hearts:
:verily in that are signs for those who reflect." (Surah Al Rum 30:21)
:But Allah Subhanahu wa Ta'ala knows that the human heart is not a static
:entity, it is sometimes weak and at times dynamic. Feelings can and do change
:with time. Love may wither and fade away. The marital bond might weaken if not
:properly cared for. Happiness in marriage cannot be taken for granted;
:continuous happiness requires constant giving from both sides. For the tree of
:marital love to remain alive and keep growing, the soil has to be sustained,
:maintained, watered and nurtured.
:Remember that our Prophet Muhammad Salallaahu 'aliahi wa'sallaam had found the
:time to go out to the desert and race with his wife Aisha. She outran him but
:later after she had gained some weight, he outran her. Remember that the
:Prophet Salallaahu 'aliahi wa'sallaam took his wife to watch the young
:Ethiopians playing and dancing their folk dances. The show of emotions is
:necessary to keep the marital bond away from rusting and disintegrating.
:Remember that you will be rewarded by Allah Subhanahu wa Ta'ala for any
:emotions you show to your wife as the Prophet Salallaahu 'aliahi wa'sallaam
:said "One would be rewarded for anything that he does seeking the pleasure of
:Allah even the food that he puts in the mouth of his wife" Never underestimate
:the importance of seemingly little things as putting food in your wife's
mouth,
:opening the car door for her, etc. Remember that the Prophet
Salallaahu 'aliahi
:wa'sallaam used to extend his knee to his wife to assist her up to ride the
:camel. Try to always find some time for both of you to pray together.
:Strengthening the bond between you and Allah Subhanahu wa Ta'ala is the best
:guarantee that your own marital bond would always remain strong. Having
:peace with Allah Subhanahu wa Ta'ala will always result in having more peace
at
:home. Remember that the Prophet Salallaahu 'aliahi wa'sallaam gave glad
:tidings for those couples who wake up at night to pray together. The Prophet
:Salallaahu 'aliahi wa'sallaam even urged the spouse who rises up first to wake
:the other spouse up, even by splashing cold water on his/her face. Always try
:your best to be good to your wife by words and by deeds. Talk to her, smile to
:her, seek her advice, ask for her opinion, spend quality time with
:her and always remember that the Prophet Salallaahu 'aliahi wa'sallaam
:said, "The best of you are those who are best to their wives".
:
:Finally, it is common that spouses vow to love and honor their spouses until
:death do them part. I do believe that this vow is good or even great, but not
:enough! It is not enough that you love your wife. You have to love what she
:loves as well. Her family, her loved ones must also become your loved ones.
:Don't be like my colleague who was unhappy about his wife's parents coming to
:visit for few weeks. He candidly said to her "I don't like your parents."
:Naturally she angrily looked at him straight in the eye and said, "I don't
like
:yours either." Also, it is not enough that you love her until death do you
:part. Love should never end and we do believe there is life after
:death where those who did righteousness in this world will be joined by their
:spouses (Surah Al Zukhruf 3:70) and offsprings. The best example in this
:regard is the Prophet Salallaahu 'aliahi wa'sallaam whose love for Khadija,
his
:wife of 25 years, extended to include all those she loved; this love of his
:continued even after her death. It was many years after her death and he never
:forgot her and whenever a goat was slaughtered in his house he would send
:portions of it to Khadija's family and friends
Sounds like the kind of men most females are looking--if one is looking!!
Marriage is the truimph of imagination over intelligence, second marriage is
truimph of hope over experience. Any quality men out there stand up and
identify. Well, I see we have a long line.
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